Crisis by Hesse Hermann

Author:Hesse, Hermann [Hesse, Hermann]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781466835054
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux
Published: 2015-05-23T16:00:00+00:00

A Bad Night

By now they must be at the Odeon,

Drinking champagne, dancing, for all I know,

And wondering where I am. I said I’d go.

Instead I’m in this stinking bar alone.

I broke my promise. I was feeling low,

I couldn’t bring myself to shave and dress

And travel to the other end of town.

In a fit of silly, sulky childishness

I grabbed my oldest hat and clattered down

The stairs. And now I’m sitting here

Consuming hard-boiled eggs and beer,

Disgusted with myself for making

Hash of an evening long looked forward to.

I guess I’ll drink until my head starts aching,

Smoke two, three, four cigars, and when I’m through

Start home. Then maybe on the way

I’ll stop off at the Bear and go on drinking

Until I really feel I’m sinking

In filth and misery. I hope I may

Never get home, I hope a car

Hits me, I hope its rubber tires erase

Me, wipe me off the face

Of the earth. It should have happened long ago.

I’m always, always too late, whatever I do.

Step on it, driver, your victim’s just ahead!

And, pastor, be ready with your prayers for the dead!

I’ll never have the courage. Really now,

I’d feel ashamed if I hadn’t forgotten how.

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